one year ago....

Friday marked one year to the day we received the referral of a little girl that we accepted.However, due to medical issues, we did not go through with it.

I looked back at the blog and realized I never spoke to what happened. I think I was in a complete fog at the time. Being a mom is something I had wanted since I was young. We had been through many years of trials, heartache, and despair. As we went through the adoption process my mind was completely focused on getting our child. I was in complete shock when I received the phone call from Lina. I dont remember much, but I guess I kept saying I need time to process. As I think back to November 30, I am still extremely impressed with how Poland and our agency handled the situation.

I am a firm believer that God has a plan. I always say "I know God has a plan, I just drive my self crazy trying to figure out that plan". I also know that God doesn't give you more than  you can handle, but I think at times he has grossly misjudged me! I know that Julia has been our daughter since she was born, but we had a rocky rocky road to find her. However, I need to stay on topic! Right before our date to leave to meet the little girl, we received a phone call that there was a medical finding and it didnt look good. I am extremely impressed that they even called to let us know. We had already accepted, they could have just kept it a secret and sent an ill little girl home with us. Then the second impressive thing Poland did........ They had Julia as the referral and we could keep our dates to travel. Yes, we had our flights to travel. It was an extremely emotional day. We had been preparing for one little girl and we were hurt to know she was so ill. We were extremely grateful for the new referral of Julia, but our hearts still hurt for that little girl. 

We found out on our second trip that the original medical diagnosis was not accurate and she was going to be placed with another family. We are extremely happy that she has found her forever family! 

I don't want this to come across that we arent EXTREMELY grateful for Julia, we are! Julia is us from her nose to her toes! She was meant to be with us.  I am just reflecting on how crazy our road to her was and how wonderful Poland was to us!!!